Well, my 25th year into this life sure sucked monkeyballs. I'm struggling with myself and my addictions pretty hard this year. Besides that, I have and had some personal issues, of which I won't speak today since I already did that too much.
I started a new blog today, just for myself really, for writing down my feelings in my native language. Also, this will probably mean I'll keep the whining and complaining to myself, and will try to have more descent articles. So keep on visiting folks, better days and posts are hopefully coming your and my way.
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
maandag 25 mei 2015
zondag 10 mei 2015
Probably for the first time here at this blog - GOOD NEWS
Hiya folks. I haven't been posting since I have been really busy with (guess what) school. I also started going out and hanging out with friends more often. On top of that, I was 4 books behind on my goodreads reading schedule. Yes.
Anyway, I still can't believe how many good stuff has happened since I got back from Berlin. I can even make a list.
I really try to keep this blog going but I have so little time... I miss writing.
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
Anyway, I still can't believe how many good stuff has happened since I got back from Berlin. I can even make a list.
- MY MOMS TUMOR HAS SHRUNK MORE THAN HALF OF IT'S SIZE
- I passed all my exams
- I feel much, much better and finally found peace with certain stuff
- I made a decision concerning my studies
I really try to keep this blog going but I have so little time... I miss writing.
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
dinsdag 14 april 2015
Berlin, ich liebe dich!
I never had the chance to travel much. My parents never went abroad except for Luxemburg, which is even smaller than Belgium. Anyway, it's never too late to start travelling, so me and my best friend decided to hit the road and leave for Berlin.
I always wanted to visit this city. Not only is it a historical city, with parts of the Berlin wall still standing and of course, the Reichstag and other buildings. It's also the capitol of electronical music, with Kraftwerk and others. Besides that, it's also and absolutely beautiful city, I can recommend it to every one.
We left on tuesday and I got sick on wednesday... Bad karma I guess. Still, we had an awesome time, sadly enough we had to leave way too soon. We saw Unter den Linden, Berlins most famous Boulevard. We visited the 'Deutsches Historisches Museum' at said Boulevard. It was amazing, I love old art and I love the reformation, of which this museum has a big collection. I drooled all over the place.
Since I grew up in a small town and moved for Antwerp 4 years ago, I'd like to make a little comparison.
1. German roads are perfect. It's like driving on feathers. 100 meters before the Flemish border, the roads become all noisy and bumpy. I never believed this 'rumour' to be true, but it is. Belgian roads suck.
2. Berlin has very little cycle paths, people just ride their bikes on the freeways. German drivers seem to know this, and try to make space for them. Still, traffic in the city is very chaotic, and I must admit I was scared a lot while driving through Berlin.
3. Berlin is not expensive at all. I really thought we would have to pay a lot more for drinks and food, but if you look around a little bit, cheap dinner is easy to be found.
4. Parks! Trees! Berlin is known for being a 'green' city, but the parks are literally everywhere, and they're clean, too.
5. The architecture is so much better than over here. In Belgium, we have ribbon building, which is ugly as hell. Berlin does have huge appartment blocks, but they all seem to fit in.
6. Belgium still has better beer. I refuse to drink German beer, so we had to drink cocktails or longdrinks during our stay. A little win for Belgium.
7. People are really open-minded over there. While people in Antwerp seem to be scared of minorities, Berlin embraces them. It's funny, since over here we have a much bigger population of muslims.
8. Party. This city truly never sleeps. Sadly enough we couldn't hit a club since I was ill, but the hostel we stayed at had a great bar which didn't close until 4.
Hmmm.. I want to go back!
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
I always wanted to visit this city. Not only is it a historical city, with parts of the Berlin wall still standing and of course, the Reichstag and other buildings. It's also the capitol of electronical music, with Kraftwerk and others. Besides that, it's also and absolutely beautiful city, I can recommend it to every one.
We left on tuesday and I got sick on wednesday... Bad karma I guess. Still, we had an awesome time, sadly enough we had to leave way too soon. We saw Unter den Linden, Berlins most famous Boulevard. We visited the 'Deutsches Historisches Museum' at said Boulevard. It was amazing, I love old art and I love the reformation, of which this museum has a big collection. I drooled all over the place.
Since I grew up in a small town and moved for Antwerp 4 years ago, I'd like to make a little comparison.
1. German roads are perfect. It's like driving on feathers. 100 meters before the Flemish border, the roads become all noisy and bumpy. I never believed this 'rumour' to be true, but it is. Belgian roads suck.
2. Berlin has very little cycle paths, people just ride their bikes on the freeways. German drivers seem to know this, and try to make space for them. Still, traffic in the city is very chaotic, and I must admit I was scared a lot while driving through Berlin.
3. Berlin is not expensive at all. I really thought we would have to pay a lot more for drinks and food, but if you look around a little bit, cheap dinner is easy to be found.
4. Parks! Trees! Berlin is known for being a 'green' city, but the parks are literally everywhere, and they're clean, too.
5. The architecture is so much better than over here. In Belgium, we have ribbon building, which is ugly as hell. Berlin does have huge appartment blocks, but they all seem to fit in.
6. Belgium still has better beer. I refuse to drink German beer, so we had to drink cocktails or longdrinks during our stay. A little win for Belgium.
7. People are really open-minded over there. While people in Antwerp seem to be scared of minorities, Berlin embraces them. It's funny, since over here we have a much bigger population of muslims.
8. Party. This city truly never sleeps. Sadly enough we couldn't hit a club since I was ill, but the hostel we stayed at had a great bar which didn't close until 4.
Hmmm.. I want to go back!
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
zondag 12 april 2015
Goddamn.
I try, I REALLY try to write but I'm not getting there, yet.
Berlin was great. The city, at least. I was physically and mentally ill.
I'm trying to quit smoking.
I have a lot, lot lot to figure out
hang in there all of you who reads this
this, too. shall pass.
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
Berlin was great. The city, at least. I was physically and mentally ill.
I'm trying to quit smoking.
I have a lot, lot lot to figure out
hang in there all of you who reads this
this, too. shall pass.
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
zaterdag 21 maart 2015
Personal updates, again
6 more days and my exams will be OVER. I'm counting the hours. (not really, but I really can't wait to be done). Up till now, everything has gone according to plan, I did screw up two exams and didn't perform that well on two others, but those grades will be combined with four other exams which did go well.
Since I have little free time, I prefer spending the hours I have with reading. I'm not online as much as I used to, and I do miss writing. I hope to have more time in the two week vacation that's coming up. After that, I'll have 5 weeks of classes and exams, again. But when those are done, I hope I've passed everything so I'll have a three-month vacation.
My mom is doing fine, she is starting to lose hair and she's tired a lot, but her spirit still is high and overall, she's doing great. She'll have another chemo on April, 2th, after that she'll have tests to see if it worked. It'll be some scary weeks to come, but I dare to hope a little bit.
My dad is still as depressed as a donkey. I don't see him having a speedy recovery anytime soon. He still limps, he still sighs whenever something happens, and he still hangs in the sofa all day, staring.
I'm doing allright. Studying takes my mind of off things, so that's a good thing I guess.
I'll try to put up some descent posts when I have the time. I have a new Ebola post planned and there are some things happening in Belgium I just have to discuss. But now, 6 more days of hell and boredom! (and the 'occasional' I-drank-too-much-wine evening)
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
Since I have little free time, I prefer spending the hours I have with reading. I'm not online as much as I used to, and I do miss writing. I hope to have more time in the two week vacation that's coming up. After that, I'll have 5 weeks of classes and exams, again. But when those are done, I hope I've passed everything so I'll have a three-month vacation.
My mom is doing fine, she is starting to lose hair and she's tired a lot, but her spirit still is high and overall, she's doing great. She'll have another chemo on April, 2th, after that she'll have tests to see if it worked. It'll be some scary weeks to come, but I dare to hope a little bit.
My dad is still as depressed as a donkey. I don't see him having a speedy recovery anytime soon. He still limps, he still sighs whenever something happens, and he still hangs in the sofa all day, staring.
I'm doing allright. Studying takes my mind of off things, so that's a good thing I guess.
I'll try to put up some descent posts when I have the time. I have a new Ebola post planned and there are some things happening in Belgium I just have to discuss. But now, 6 more days of hell and boredom! (and the 'occasional' I-drank-too-much-wine evening)
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
maandag 16 maart 2015
A wall between us
Sometimes I wonder about how hard it seems to get in touch with people. I'm not talking about friends or relatives now, but strangers, passing us by every day.
I live in Antwerp, as you all know. My place is close to the underground, and whenever I'm home I ride the metro almost every day. One of the platforms is very deep, with a long moving staircase down. It's a chilly, nihilistic place full of graffiti and decorated with occasional piles of puke. It was at this melancholic place I first saw 'the beatnik'.
Mr Beatnik was in very bad shape that morning. He was standing up, at the stairs next to the moving staircase. He seemed to be asleep while standing. I asked him if he was okay, and he replied he was fine. I've seen him several times after that first encouter. His favourite place to sit is said stairs. After a few times I noticed he had a leg prothesis. Sometimes he's singing and sometimes he's sleeping. One time he was on the same metro as me, and he was talking to other travelers, in English, with visible joy and enthousiasm.
He always sits down and he never looks up or seems to care when children make fun of him. All remarks and comments people make seem to glide of off him like water. What intrigues me the most about him, is that he is always reading an old, wrinkled book. That's where the metaphorical wall comes into play: ever since I've seen him reading, I've been dying to know which book it is. It must have significant value for him, because it's always the same book and it doesn't look like he has any other possessions.
Last week, I took the moving staircase and he was sitting at his spot. When I crossed him, I decided that this was the day, this time I'll ask him, this moment, I'll know. But I couldn't. I already opened my mouth to pop the question, but the words went dry on my lips, I just couldn't do it.
Why? I wondered about this question for some time. First, I blamed in on the language: I heard him speak English once, so I was in doubt, should I speak in Dutch or English? But this excuse is way too easy. Truth is, I find it hard to reach out to people. I rather not answer the question. Because reaching out to someone requires not only interest, but also strenght. Because people could just block us off. Because maybe, people won't be happy with the interest you give them.
What does this learn me? Simple. I have a lot of ideals and a lot of ideas I find valuable, but acting according to those values, is not as easy as it seems.
I'll keep you updated on this.
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
I live in Antwerp, as you all know. My place is close to the underground, and whenever I'm home I ride the metro almost every day. One of the platforms is very deep, with a long moving staircase down. It's a chilly, nihilistic place full of graffiti and decorated with occasional piles of puke. It was at this melancholic place I first saw 'the beatnik'.
Mr Beatnik was in very bad shape that morning. He was standing up, at the stairs next to the moving staircase. He seemed to be asleep while standing. I asked him if he was okay, and he replied he was fine. I've seen him several times after that first encouter. His favourite place to sit is said stairs. After a few times I noticed he had a leg prothesis. Sometimes he's singing and sometimes he's sleeping. One time he was on the same metro as me, and he was talking to other travelers, in English, with visible joy and enthousiasm.
He always sits down and he never looks up or seems to care when children make fun of him. All remarks and comments people make seem to glide of off him like water. What intrigues me the most about him, is that he is always reading an old, wrinkled book. That's where the metaphorical wall comes into play: ever since I've seen him reading, I've been dying to know which book it is. It must have significant value for him, because it's always the same book and it doesn't look like he has any other possessions.
Last week, I took the moving staircase and he was sitting at his spot. When I crossed him, I decided that this was the day, this time I'll ask him, this moment, I'll know. But I couldn't. I already opened my mouth to pop the question, but the words went dry on my lips, I just couldn't do it.
Why? I wondered about this question for some time. First, I blamed in on the language: I heard him speak English once, so I was in doubt, should I speak in Dutch or English? But this excuse is way too easy. Truth is, I find it hard to reach out to people. I rather not answer the question. Because reaching out to someone requires not only interest, but also strenght. Because people could just block us off. Because maybe, people won't be happy with the interest you give them.
What does this learn me? Simple. I have a lot of ideals and a lot of ideas I find valuable, but acting according to those values, is not as easy as it seems.
I'll keep you updated on this.
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
dinsdag 3 maart 2015
MyReads: February
Suzanne Collins - 'Mockingjay'
I have to admit it, I love the Hunger games trilogy. I know Hollywood is raping the script and turning it into some scary MK ULTRA, predictive programming thing, but still these books are the best young adult fiction I've read in years. (I don't really have anything to compare except Twilight, which sucked donkey balls. note to self: read more young adult fiction) I won't spoil anything for anyone, just read the damn trilogy.
my score: 7/10
Andrew Pyper - 'The trade mission' (read in Dutch; title: 'Handelsmissie')
I was really scared of this book when I started it. Set in the jungle of Brazil, 2 young entrepreneurs, one helper and a tolk go on a boat trip. They get captured and tortured by locals. I picked up this book because the description said it was like a modern 'Deliverance', and I love that novel. My fears were uncalled for, the torture practices aren't described in much detail and the book, in general, wasn't that scary. It did make me think of human nature and made me wonder what I would have done while in the same situation. Which is hard, since I never lived traumas that severe. Was it as good as 'Deliverance'? Hell naw. But I can see why thy made the comparison. It took me 2 weeks to finish, I started and finished other books before I finished this one. After the last chapter, I must admit I think it was a little waste of time. I might read some of his other books tho.
My score: 6/10
Donald Thomas - 'The Marquis the Sade, a new biography' (read in Dutch; title: 'Markies de Sade, de definitieve biografie')
A friend who used to be obsessed with de Sade lended this one to me. It was much more interesting than I thought it would be. I never was fond of biographies, but this one points out how de Sade was not just a pervert, but a product of his age. If you're interested in history in general and de Sade in particular, I highly recommend it. It was well written, clear and gave me a different view on his literature. I'm still not sure if I will read one of the Sade's books, probably not. But I did learn a lot from it and I might start reading more biographies.
my score: 7/10
Michael Robotham - 'The night Ferry' (read in Dutch; title: 'Nachtboot')
An okay thriller, the third book I've read from his hand. While you can read all his books apart, I recommend you start with his first one ('the suspect'), since a lot of characters introduced here keep on coming back. I still wonder why I keep reading his books, they aren't badly written or boring. But I always feel something is missing, I can't put a finger on what it is. Still, it was a good story. It's about illegal child trafficking and surrogate mothers.
my score: 6/10
Chuck Palahniuk - 'Fight Club'
This classic needs no further introduction. I saw the movie about 5 years ago and I didn't get the ending at all, so reading the book made a lot of things more clear. I must say the book is adapted into a movie in a brilliant way, I recognised several quotes. The book in itself is written brilliantly and reads really fast. I found my copy at one of my favourite second-hand books stores. Too bad they had like 1684 copies staring at me, I was looking for this book for ages so I was pretty shocked to finally see it in so many copies. Luckily this has nothing to do with the quality of the book. Written in a brilliant, fast style, I finally understand what all the fuss was about.
My score: 8.5/10
Kathryn Stockett - 'The help' (read in Dutch; title: 'Een keukenmeidenroman') (probably one of the worst title-translations ever. 'De hulp' would've worked just fine.)
Can't say I liked the ending, and some of the characters were really black and white, but besides those two remarks, I enjoyed this book. Set in Mississippi during the sixties, we follow some white women and their black helps. The book made me angry at times, but it did shine light at how hard it was, even for white people, to try and change things.Good reading, not so high in literature and some characters are a bit dull, but the book had a great spirit and I enjoyed the journey.
My score: 6/10
Haruki Murakami - '1q84, part one' (read in Dutch, same title)
Wow, just wow. Before I started reading this, I read 4 other Murakami novels. 'After dark', which was okay, 'Norwegian wood' and 'South of the border, West of the sun', which I both loved, and 'A wild sheep chase', which I hated with a passion and never finished.
But this... We follow Tengo, a math teacher and ghostwriter of a best-seller, and Aomame, who works at a gym, but secretly kills men. As the story continues, more and more facts make clear that Aomame and Tengo must've met much earlier. Strange concepts and people are introduced, and way too soon the book is over. I just had to start reading the second one right away.
I don't know why I love certain Murakami books and loathe others. I do know I love this one, although I would like to see a little less descriptions about sex, but that's a personal preference I guess. All I know is this, I can't wait to know how it ends.
my score: 9/10
Books that match my 2015 reading challenge
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
I have to admit it, I love the Hunger games trilogy. I know Hollywood is raping the script and turning it into some scary MK ULTRA, predictive programming thing, but still these books are the best young adult fiction I've read in years. (I don't really have anything to compare except Twilight, which sucked donkey balls. note to self: read more young adult fiction) I won't spoil anything for anyone, just read the damn trilogy.
my score: 7/10
Andrew Pyper - 'The trade mission' (read in Dutch; title: 'Handelsmissie')
I was really scared of this book when I started it. Set in the jungle of Brazil, 2 young entrepreneurs, one helper and a tolk go on a boat trip. They get captured and tortured by locals. I picked up this book because the description said it was like a modern 'Deliverance', and I love that novel. My fears were uncalled for, the torture practices aren't described in much detail and the book, in general, wasn't that scary. It did make me think of human nature and made me wonder what I would have done while in the same situation. Which is hard, since I never lived traumas that severe. Was it as good as 'Deliverance'? Hell naw. But I can see why thy made the comparison. It took me 2 weeks to finish, I started and finished other books before I finished this one. After the last chapter, I must admit I think it was a little waste of time. I might read some of his other books tho.
My score: 6/10
Donald Thomas - 'The Marquis the Sade, a new biography' (read in Dutch; title: 'Markies de Sade, de definitieve biografie')
A friend who used to be obsessed with de Sade lended this one to me. It was much more interesting than I thought it would be. I never was fond of biographies, but this one points out how de Sade was not just a pervert, but a product of his age. If you're interested in history in general and de Sade in particular, I highly recommend it. It was well written, clear and gave me a different view on his literature. I'm still not sure if I will read one of the Sade's books, probably not. But I did learn a lot from it and I might start reading more biographies.
my score: 7/10
Michael Robotham - 'The night Ferry' (read in Dutch; title: 'Nachtboot')
An okay thriller, the third book I've read from his hand. While you can read all his books apart, I recommend you start with his first one ('the suspect'), since a lot of characters introduced here keep on coming back. I still wonder why I keep reading his books, they aren't badly written or boring. But I always feel something is missing, I can't put a finger on what it is. Still, it was a good story. It's about illegal child trafficking and surrogate mothers.
my score: 6/10
Chuck Palahniuk - 'Fight Club'
This classic needs no further introduction. I saw the movie about 5 years ago and I didn't get the ending at all, so reading the book made a lot of things more clear. I must say the book is adapted into a movie in a brilliant way, I recognised several quotes. The book in itself is written brilliantly and reads really fast. I found my copy at one of my favourite second-hand books stores. Too bad they had like 1684 copies staring at me, I was looking for this book for ages so I was pretty shocked to finally see it in so many copies. Luckily this has nothing to do with the quality of the book. Written in a brilliant, fast style, I finally understand what all the fuss was about.
My score: 8.5/10
Kathryn Stockett - 'The help' (read in Dutch; title: 'Een keukenmeidenroman') (probably one of the worst title-translations ever. 'De hulp' would've worked just fine.)
Can't say I liked the ending, and some of the characters were really black and white, but besides those two remarks, I enjoyed this book. Set in Mississippi during the sixties, we follow some white women and their black helps. The book made me angry at times, but it did shine light at how hard it was, even for white people, to try and change things.Good reading, not so high in literature and some characters are a bit dull, but the book had a great spirit and I enjoyed the journey.
My score: 6/10
Haruki Murakami - '1q84, part one' (read in Dutch, same title)
Wow, just wow. Before I started reading this, I read 4 other Murakami novels. 'After dark', which was okay, 'Norwegian wood' and 'South of the border, West of the sun', which I both loved, and 'A wild sheep chase', which I hated with a passion and never finished.
But this... We follow Tengo, a math teacher and ghostwriter of a best-seller, and Aomame, who works at a gym, but secretly kills men. As the story continues, more and more facts make clear that Aomame and Tengo must've met much earlier. Strange concepts and people are introduced, and way too soon the book is over. I just had to start reading the second one right away.
I don't know why I love certain Murakami books and loathe others. I do know I love this one, although I would like to see a little less descriptions about sex, but that's a personal preference I guess. All I know is this, I can't wait to know how it ends.
my score: 9/10
Books that match my 2015 reading challenge
- A book a friend recommended: The marquis the Sade
- A book by an author you've never read before: The trade mission
- A book set somewhere you've always wanted to visit: The help
Sabetha
pissedofpenguin@gmail.com
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